bourbon & black walnut


Bourbon Orange liqueur Maple syrup Black walnut bitters Orange peel Ice

Put some ice in a cup. I used a metal cup because I wish I was metal. \m/

One shot of bourbon, filled to the tippy top.

Drink the shot. Just kidding; pour it into the metal cup with the ice.

Add, I dunno, like a half-shot of orange liqueur?

Here it is: the black walnut bitters. Add three dashes.

Make sure it's black walnut and not just walnut. Just walnut is not metal.


Pour in a bit of maple syrup. Pour it for one Earth-second. Do it at about 25% capacity of the pouring apparatus.

Stir it all up. Maybe take a bathroom break. Whatever you gotta do.

“Stirring is an important part of the drink-making process.”

— ME

We're almost done, here. Get yourself some orange peel.

I heard it was cool to flame-singe/toast/roast/burn the orange peel.

Pour your drink out of the metal cup into a more lady-like cup. (You can be a dude or whatever and still drink out of a sexy, lady-like cup. Don't worry. It looks cool.)


I got distracted three times making this drink. Everything was just sitting in this metal cup, ice melting, me cleaning up cat barf, but you know what? It was probably for the best. Drink tastes good. I feel good. Drink up.

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  • karen

    this is hilarious. and i think i'll make one.

  • tinyxl

    @karen I highly recommend it! Might be good with a little less maple syrup than I used. But whatever. Saturday.

  • ThePulpandRind

    Hilarious. Thank you for being funny.

  • mamalizzy



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